It’s a scene from everyone’s worst nightmare: You’re in the bedroom, making love with your partner, and then, deep in the throes of passion, just when the imminent orgasm is about to occur, your partner screams out someone else’s name.
Erotic massage or sensuous massage is the use of massage techniques to achieve or enhance sexual arousal. Massages have been used for medical purposes for a very long time. Its use for erotic purposes also has a long history.
One cannot generalize as to why someone is experiencing a low level of sexual desire. Loss of libido can have a variety of causes, some psychological, some not.
I am not surprised by the results that 85% of men said the last person they slept with had an orgasm, but only 64% of women said they did. Men can't hide it when they orgasm – it's an easy one to verify – but with women, it's not so easy, at least not with all women. From what I have heard clinically, there are a couple of things going on here. Many men just assume women have orgasmed and don't ask.
Pleasing a man should be at the top of your priority list if you're in a serious relationship with one, most especially if he answers to the name of "husband". It seems that today there are too many women who have forgotten this and are so busy seeking after what they want that they forget to take the needs and desires of their significant others into consideration. It is a silly thing, really, because a satisfied and happy man will almost always see to the needs and desires of the women who is keeping him that way.
Don't find love, let love find you. That's why it's called falling in love because you don't force yourself to fall, you just fall. Once you accept someone for who and what they really are, they will surprise you by being better than you ever expected. LOVE is loving/accepting a person with all his/her strength and weaknesses.
A sexy smile, good hands, rhythmic hips — no doubt, your guy has what it takes to get you off. But there's one more thing that can seriously up your odds of climaxing.
Knowing how to seduce a woman into wanting you just sounds like one of those, yeah right, kind of dreams for most guys. Yet, there are some men out there that seem to be able to do exactly that. And, the funny thing is, they don't have a famous name, they don't have a six or seven figure income, and women still seem to fall for them... every time!
Best selling American author and columnist Sherry Argov tells you why you need to shed the good girl tag to win the love match.
Ovulating women unconsciously buy sexier clothes in order to catch a mate at just the right time.
Q. I understand that females want men who care, who bond with them and make them feel special, but I have seen a lot of women who respect "bad boys" more than they do a guy who is romantic. In other words, the nice romantic guy does all that work and the player plays with the girl and ends up with her !!! I always see this.
Most couples have faced this situation sometime or another in their sexual life even as the sex nosedives and vanishes for days/months and in worst case scenarios maybe even for years. Learning to recognise the symptoms behind a low sex drive helps to get out of the sticky situation. Here are the most common myths about your low sexual levels:
In our days all women want orgasms. That wasn't always the case. A couple of generations or so ago, many adult females simply didn't have climaxes – and a lot of them weren't bothered about it. Probably a lot of them didn't actually know what an orgasm was.
And some doctors claimed that, for a huge proportion of women, it was 'normal' to have no experience of orgasm. Indeed, as late as the 1970s there were still some who maintained that the female orgasm didn't exist – and was simply a myth made up by the media.
All that has changed now. These days, medical opinion is that every woman should be able to have orgasms – if she wants to. Furthermore, the view of most sex experts is that the majority of women are capable of multiple orgasms – if they wish to have them. In general, the ability to have multiple orgasms is greater in more mature women.
We're writing this explanation in the assumption that you – the reader – are male. But what follows will be of interest to a lot of female readers too.
What happens in a woman's body during a climax is very like what happens in your (male) body when you ejaculate. In other words, there's a feeling of increasing excitement, building up to a point where everything 'blows' in a great blast of ecstasy. This 'orgasmic moment' is characterised by surges of contractions in the sex organs, occurring almost every 0.8 seconds.
Men are well aware that these throbs of pleasure are accompanied by the pumping out of spurts of seminal fluid. Obviously this doesn't happen in women.
A few females do produce some fluid at orgasm, but the impression given in so many erotic stories that most women 'ejaculate' is not correct. Only a minority of females do this.
Multiple orgasm
The other big difference between male and female orgasm is this: after the first climax, many women can 'come' again, often within a minute or two.
This ability is extremely rare in males. Relatively few young women can achieve multiple orgasm, because it's an ability that usually has to be learned. But with the help of a skilled lover, most women can eventually achieve the capacity for multiple orgasms – if they so desire.
Bringing women to a climax
For men perhaps the most important thing to realise about female climaxes is that with women, it's not a mechanical thing – as it generally is with men.
You see, most males will ejaculate quite quickly if they have their penises rubbed. This applies even if the circumstances aren't very romantic – or even if they don't particularly like the person who's doing the rubbing! Women are not like this. Female orgasm isn't a push-button response. The conditions have to be right.
Although females vary, many women need the following if they're going to reach a climax easily:
Unless you can provide the above, you are not going to have great success in giving your partner orgasms.
Please bear in mind that – contrary to what many men think – sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman's clitoris. Nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth.
So, try not to give the impression to your female partner that she ‘ought’ to be able to climax through intercourse alone and that that is what you think of as ‘proper sex’. The sex menu can be a varied one. Some women, for example, find it really easy to climax through oral sex – particularly if the guy is patient and sensitive to what his partner wants. And how does he find out what she wants and what turns her on? Well, a wise man will ask her.
What he should not do is to assume that his technique is flawless and that if his partner does not come, it’s her fault. Plenty of men think that because a previous girlfriend always came a certain way, this one should follow suit. Women are not all the same in their likes or dislikes. So do try to treat your partner as an individual.
Many women like much more foreplay or loveplay than men imagine. They want to feel that the man is keen on giving pleasure – and not just in a hurry to have his own climax. In fact, the worst thing a man can say to a woman is: ‘Haven’t you come yet?’ This is likely to make her feel extremely inadequate and will ruin any build-up of sexual pleasure and tension that might have been taking place.
In summary, here's what to do if you want to bring your partner to orgasm regularly:
Lovemaking is wonderful and it’s even more thrilling when it is prolonged and filled with passion. One of the most effective ways to increase sexual stamina in both men and women is to increase your physical activity.This can mean everything from taking a walk to joining a gym. Getting the heart rate up and the body moving is an exhilarating experience. It can increase the level of testosterone hormone within the body; the very hormone ... responsible for sexual stamina.
Workout For Sex
This translates into a longer and more satisfying sexual experience for both partners. The added benefit is that the exercise can be done together. A couple can take up jogging or swimming together and the closeness generated from that experience carries over into their sexual encounters as well as increased sex drive.
Sex Stamina Medicines
There have recently been some topical medications developed that are said to increase sexual stamina. They work as a cream based formula that your lover applies to you. Once the cream is smoothed in it helps you feel more responsive. You enjoy your lovers touch much more with leads to more effective lovemaking session.
Rest For Sex
A great way to increase sexual stamina and sexual performance is to make sure you are rested. This means getting a full night’s sleep each and every night. It’s difficult to become romantic when you are tired. If you are both rested you’ll enjoy each other and the experience so much more.
Stress Kills Sex
Stress can be a contributing factor when it comes to sexual stamina. You might find yourself swept up in the moment of lovemaking and then because of other pressing concerns, your mind will begin to wander. This changes sex from being a pleasurable experience to becoming a chore.
Take time before you make love to relax. Perhaps giving each other a massage, or taking a bath together. Allow the stress of your life to slip away so you and your partner can have the longest most rewarding intimate encounter you possibly can.
Those we are close to are related to us in complex ways, historically, biologically, and in terms of soul-connection. Yet often, what outpictures on the level of the physical, does not reflect the intensity and meaningfulness of the soul connection that has brought us into proximity with another, whether for a few moments or for a lifetime.
Where the bond is strong and one of commitment, we tend to assume that there is a deeper connection. However, what is actually true is that this connection exists even where relationships do not function smoothly or carry a great deal of difficulty. Even in such cases, the soul connection may be one of a purely positive nature, though many serious problems or challenges may be manifesting on the physical plane.
The confusion about levels of relationship comes up commonly in two ways: when we feel a deep heart connection with someone, whether for a few moments or for many years, and this sense of connection is not reciprocated or acknowledged by the other, or, when we have a great deal of difficulty with another or suffer at the hands of another, and wonder why they are in our lives and what, that is positive, could be the purpose of such a relationship. In both cases, we are presuming a relationship on a different level that is the explanation or cause for what we are experiencing.
The truth of soul relationships is more complex than most are aware of at this point. On the one hand, what one soul recognizes may not be what another is capable of perceiving at a given point in time. This does not make the relationship or connection untrue. It just means that the other is bound in their perception by limitations on the personality level and cannot register or be aware of the deeper currents of relatedness. The discrepancy between our own perception of things and that of someone else can lead to disappointment and even to sorrow if we do not understand that what exists at the soul level has to find its way into physical expression in its own way and time. In some instances this may not happen nor serve the highest good within a particular lifetime.
Similarly, with relationships that have a strong negative component, whether familial or introduced by external circumstances into our life. Souls never come together to harm each other. They always come together in order to further each other's learning on the level of the heart and spirit. No matter who we encounter in life, especially in the context of a long-term connection, the other soul is crossing our path in order to convey something that we have chosen to learn. What this is, involves the mystery of embodied experience, and can shape the course of a lifetime.
Suffice it to say that often, the direction we think things should go in with another, does not become the direction that they actually go in. This is not because the inner connection is not there or is faulty, but because the point of meeting with another brings into awareness for each participant, the portion of meaning they are capable of holding in the present, and what is true within the perception of one person may not be true for the other.
Souls, in their desire and capacity to help each other, may also choose periods of time apart from each other. Sometimes the separation is what is needed in order to further the relationship. Sometimes, the learning that takes place can only take place with periodic or intermittent contact with another. In addition, there are many levels of meeting or contact between souls. Souls have the capacity of meeting not just on the physical plane, but on the plane of dreams which, for many, involves actual meetings that are conducted within the energy-body while asleep.
The kind of communication and support that can take place through these non-physical meetings can be quite significant. They can further or continue a relationship, even where one participant has left their body through death. This is because those who have departed are still connected with us as souls and can choose, for various reasons, to meet us within our energy or dream bodies while asleep so that we may share further experience as part of an ongoing relationship.
Where souls are meeting primarily in the dream body as opposed to the physical body, it can happen either because the inner directives of one soul have caused them to depart from the physical plane while the other remains. It can also be caused by limitations on the level of the personality that prevent a soul from acknowledging the connection with another due to defensiveness, fear, or simply to a lack of awareness within the existing personality of what the soul knows on its own level.
And so the inner connection is maintained when the personality has less say over making contact, generally at night, but sometimes also during the day. At these times we may experience the presence of others with us where it seems that there is an intentionality to their being there and a desire to communicate in words or through feeling. Becoming able to listen and to hear these communications without fear or self-invalidation, but with a sense of wanting to help and to love, is a task of the maturing soul that opens the door to the many faceted relationships that exist within the spiritual universe.
Finally, let it be said that souls also meet outside of their physical bodies because of the level of their spiritual development and their increased capacity to do so in an intentional way. These meetings are part of the growing development of consciousness to manifest reality in a myriad of ways.
In the end the connections with others on the level of the soul enrich life immeasurably, and add to the dimension of the physical, the dimension of the spiritual in ways that will one day become quite natural and commonplace, which, for today, may seem the exception.
Browse the virtual shelves of Amazon and you’ll find hundreds of books that promise to reveal the secrets to becoming a great lover. Go to any magazine stand and you’ll see dozens of magazines with tips on how to drive your lover wild in bed, be the greatest lover known to man, and invent levels of sexual satisfaction that defy gravity and the laws of nature. The message these books convey is that with the right teacher and enough hard work you can actually become a great lover, the kind of person has all the right lines and all the right moves. Someone who, in short, can turn hop into bed with anyone and create an unforgettable night of unparalleled sexual bliss.
I’d like to propose that this is a flawed premise. I don't believe that anyone is great with everyone. I don't buy that with the right technique or know how you can have great sex with every single person you encounter. Phenomenal sex is, to some extent, about the chemistry between the two people having it. You might be someone’s idea of the perfect lover, but with another partner the sex may fall flat.
While there is something to be said for sexual technique, and knowing how to talk about sex, a “great lover” is not in the moves or the talk, it’s in the whole package.
Even the definition of what is a great lover, can be slippery. If you ask ten people you'll get ten different answers. In a way, becoming a “great lover” is probably about taking things one partner at a time. You can learn things in one sexual relationship that applies to others, but sexuality is so subjective and personal, that you can’t always generalize experience, technique, or taste. One person’s sexual turn on may be another person’s deal-breaking turn off.
Back to the first part of your question; is there a way to find out what your partners think about sex with you? There is...Ask them! I wouldn’t suggest doing this in the middle of, or immediately before, you’re going to have sex. And don't do it unless you feel like you can handle the answer. But pick a time and place that seems safe and neutral, be prepared to possibly hear things that might be challenging, and ask your partner to talk about what they like about sex with you, and what, if anything, they’d like to do differently.
Ever wonder why she’s never in the mood? Always seem to have a headache? Well according to AOL Health, men are making 5 bedroom mistakes that may be contributing to their lovers lukewarm or non-existent passion in the boudoir.
There are individuals who use their feelings of jealousy to rate how much they love their partner or how much they are loved by their partner.They believe, for instance, that if I'm feeling jealous that others are paying too much attention to my partner then that's a sign of how much I love him/her.
Alternately they may believe that if I make my partner jealous through my friendships with others that it's a sign of how much my partner loves me.
In the former case the feelings of jealousy simply reflect deep feelings of insecurity that have nothing to do with love. If your partner is being dishonest and this is obvious to you a more appropriate reaction might be to acknowledge this as a form of abuse and that this relationship is not worth entertaining further. In which case you should not feel jealous, rather relieved that you recognized it before you became further wounded.
In the latter case if "you" are intentionally "trying" to make you partner jealous to see how much he/she loves you then this too is coming from a place of deep insecurity, yours! In this case it is you who is being abusive and if this is your way of showing your love who do you expect would love you back for it, no one!
On the other hand if your partner is the jealous type and your friendships are not intended to make him/her jealous then he/she has the problem around insecurity and you the problem of deciding how much further to proceed in this relationship. If you too are insecure you may decide to put up with such a partner, If not, then you may decide otherwise, but then you already understood this.
So you see love and jealousy are not extensions of each other.
To get to a true place of love all your feelings of jealousy and therefore insecurity must be addressed for what they are; a sign that you are not yet ready for a mature relationship!
If you would like help with this journey then kindly visit the web link below where you can arrange an introductory consultation.
Dr. Nick Arrizza is trained in Chemical Engineering, Business Management & Leadership, Medicine and Psychiatry. He is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Key Note Speaker,Editor of a New Ezine Called "Spirituality And Science" Author of "Esteem for the Self: A Manual for Personal Transformation", Stress Management Coach, Peak Performance Coach & Energy Medicine Researcher, Specializes in Life and Executive Performance Coaching, is the Developer of a powerful new tool called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) that helps build physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well being by helping to permanently release negative beliefs, emotions, perceptions and memories.
He holds live workshops, international telephone coaching sessions and international teleconference workshops on Physical. Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Well Being.
